Para sa sumulat ng tula

Ang tulang ito ay para sa mga bigo and puso,

Para sa mga natatawa sa pick up lines na uso,

Para sa mga nagmistulang tanga sa kakalike ng quotes,

Para sa mga ngumangata ng quacker oats.

Para ito sa mga nagpapaasa at forever na umaasa,

Para sa mga kaibigang sa pagibig ay dalubhasa,

Para ito sa mga puppy love, TL at mga hipon,

Para ito sa mga gumagastos at sa mga nagiipon.

Para sa mga sanay magpaalam at sa mga first time,

Para ito sa mga “I love you” bukas, always at all the time,

Para to sa mga kunwaring humihikab at sinisipon,

Para ito sa mga lantarang umiiyak at forever alone.

Para ito sa mga may love life at syota,

Syokoy man o mermaid, maski bakla.

Para ito sa mga babes at pies,

Para sa mga nanggago at nagsabi ng “lies”

Para ito sa mga sugod ng sugod,

Pati na rin sa mga shy type at kunwaring pakipot,

Para sa mga emo at malungkot,

Para sa mga amoy gwapo at gwapong mabantot

Para ito sa mga mahal ninyong himig,

Pati na rin sa mga innosenteng walang hilig.

Para ito sa trying hard na sumulat ng tula,

Para saki din pala ito dahil ako ang nagsimula.








*** inspired by "Para sa Masa" by Eraserheads ***

my heart got dumped

Another one of my crush thingy rants. I never learn do I?

I know you know the scenario when a girl goes gaga over a guy, thinking that he's the love of her life but ends up CRUSHED because of her high expectations and over assuming thoughts.

Every little thing the guy does for the girl would bear meaning hence the over-assuming part. That's why I blame the girl for being an over-thinker but girls just want to be loved.

Did you guys know that there are thousands of sweet and fun and loving girls with great personality out there? Yet you brawl and kill for one sexy, over-rated girl. Ah, life's tragedy.

^Bitter. Ah never mind. I am just ranting and spreading bad vibes *evil laugh*

deflation of entries

I have noticed the deflation of my blog entries. From 17 entries on July to 1 entry on October. Would it be because of the lack of inspiration, busy schedule or another distraction?

I've made a wordpress blog and I haven't written anything significant on it yet. I was thinking if I should just dump my poems there? Should I? Just so it doesn't seem empty. hehe.

Hmm.. Time to rummage trhough my notebook and put some junk in there. hehe.

Off to wordpress, then. *winks*

nightmare

I had a nightmare and they say that it's good to write about those things because they might have some meanings.

Parthenon

All I can remember from my nightmare was two dead people were found by me in our previous house. The first body was found at our living room, the second one was at the second floor. The freaky part was the first body I discovered was my cousin who was the same age as I am. The second body was the body of a kid I formerly counselled. The story goes on how I reported it to my family members and to the police. Then, I went to work that day and when I came from work, the police consulted me and told me that I was one of the suspects, since I was the first to discovered the crime scene. And then, something happened, I can't remember what was it and now I'm on the road to Parthenon. I was in a little city with a fork road, I was on the left side. Then I woke up. The Parthenon bit was a recurring dream, I don't know what it means or what am was it implying, I guess I'll find it soon.

I am still bothered about my nightmare so I did some research.

DeadTo see the dead in your dream, forewarns that you are being influenced by negative people and are hanging around the wrong crowd.  You may suffer material loss. This dream may also be a way for you to resolve your feelings with those who have passed on.To see and talk with your dead father in your dream, signifies that you are about to enter into an unlucky transaction or rotten deal. Thoroughly think through your decisions before entering into them. To see your dead mother in your dream, signifies your wretched and mean-hearted nature towards others around you. Seeing your dead parents in your dreams, may mean your fears of losing them or your way of coping with the loss. You may want that last opportunity to say your final good-byes to them.To see your dead sibling, relative, or friend in your dream, foretells that you will soon be called on for aid and assistance. It may also mean that you miss them and are trying to relive your old experiences you had with them. In trying to keep up with the pace of your daily waking life, you dreams may serve as your only outlet in coping and coming to terms with the loss of a loved one.

Blame To dream that you are being blamed for something suggests that you are feeling powerless and helpless in some waking situation.To blame someone else for something you did in your dream indicates that you are trying to deflect responsibilities for your actions.

Recurring DreamsMost dreams contain messages that serve to teach you something about yourself. However, soon after you wake up to go about your daily routine, you tend to quickly forget what you dream about. The message in recurring dreams may be so important and/or powerful that it refuses to go away. The frequent repetition of such dreams forces you to pay attention and confront the dream. It is desperately trying to tell you something.  Such dreams are often nightmarish or frightening in their content, which also helps you to take notice and pay attention to them.Recurring dreams are quite common and are often triggered by a certain life situation, transitional phase in life or a problem that keeps coming back again and again. These dreams may recur daily, once a week, or once a month. Whatever the frequency, there is little variation in the dream content itself. Such dreams may be highlighting a personal weakness, fear, or your inability to cope with something in your life - past or present. The repetitive patterns in your dream reveal some of the most valuable information about yourself. It may point to a conflict, situation or matter in your waking life that remains unresolved or unsettled. Some urgent underlying message in your unconscious is demanding to be understood.  

I don't know if I'm enlightened but I still feel the same about my dream, like it's a foreboding of something strange and terrible is coming...

Quotes from GOT

October 15, 2011


"Why is it that when one man builds a wall, the next man immediately needs to know what's on the other side?" 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))



"Fear cuts deeper than swords." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))



"A mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))


"Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))


"Most men would rather deny a hard truth than face it." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))


"The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. If you would take a man's life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))


"Don’t call me Lord Snow.” 
The dwarf lifted an eyebrow. “Would you rather be called the Imp? Let them see that their words can cut you and you’ll never be free of the mockery. If they want to give you a name take it make it your own. Then they can’t hurt you with it anymore." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))


"My brother has his sword, King Robert has his warhammer and I have my mind...and a mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone if it is to keep its edge. That's why I read so much Jon Snow. - Tyrion Lannister" 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))



"Wind and words. We are only human, and the gods have fashioned us for love. That is our great glory, and our great tragedy." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))




"Death is so terribly final, while life is full of possibilities." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))





"Bran thought about it. 'Can a man still be brave if he's afraid?' 
'That is the only time a man can be brave,' his father told him." 
— George R.R. Martin (A Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice and Fire, #1))

Quotes (random)

October 8, 2011

“We read to know that we are not alone.” 
― C.S. Lewis




“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.” 
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman: The Kindly Ones




“It is our choices, Harry, that show us what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” 
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets




“I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.” 
― C.S. Lewis







“There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.” 
― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey







“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” 
― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves




“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default.” 
― J.K. Rowling




“You're going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter.” 
― Nicholas Sparks, The Rescue



“You can't live your life for other people. You've got to do what's right for you, even if it hurts some people you love.” 
― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook







“I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, everyday we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours. ” 
― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook







“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.” 
― Roald Dahl

I was supposed to blog a post from my journal last thursday, September 22,2011 but i guess it'll stay there. Hahaha. Still thinking if i should post it here or not.

Anyway, here's a little something for today's post, just so it doesn't look barren. hihi.

Tonight as the world slumbers
I think of you and wonder
If my name ever crossed your mind
Or I'm just a memory left behind

Tonight as the candle flickers
I write in this bounded paper
How I'm battling my fears with what I feel
Racking my head for what is real.



It's not yet finished... just venting out.

quotes (random)

September 22,2011



“I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble.”
― Helen Keller


“God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons that we could learn in no other way.”
― C.S. Lewis



“I believe the nicest and sweetest days are not those on which anything very splendid or wonderful or exciting happens, but just those that bring simple little pleasures, following one another softly, like pearls slipping off a string.”
― L.M. Montgomery


“Whatever comes," she said, "cannot alter one thing. If I am a princess in rags and tatters, I can be a princess inside. It would be easy to be a princess if I were dressed in cloth of gold, but it is a great deal more of a triumph to be one all the time when no one knows it.”
― Frances Hodgson Burnett, A Little Princess


“Live today. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Just today. Inhabit your moments. Don’t rent them out to tomorrow. Do you know what you’re doing when you spend a moment wondering how things are going to turn out with Perry?

You’re cheating yourself out of today. Today is calling to you, trying to get your attention, but you’re stuck on tomorrow, and today trickles away like water down a drain. You wake up the next morning and that today you wasted is gone forever. It’s now yesterday. Some of those moments may have had wonderful things in store for you , but now you’ll never know.”
― Jerry Spinelli, Love, Stargirl


“If you're reading this...
Congratulations, you're alive.
If that's not something to smile about,
then I don't know what is.”
― Chad Sugg, Monsters Under Your Head


“A person's a person, no matter how small.”
― Dr. Seuss

I was browsing through my goodreads account, looking for quotes for my twitter, plurk and fb status, and I came upon this quote by Mother Theresa. I'm not a Catholic but I agree with this quote.

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway… You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.” ― Mother Teresa

In the end, IT IS between God and me...

My spiritual life has not been in its brightest stage lately. I am preoccupied with wordly things... but God has been gracious again, reminding me of the things that I should put importance to, reminding me of the things I should be doing, things that should be honoring Him and nothing else. I thank God for being merciful and ever-knowing. He sustains me even though I turn away from Him.

I pray that He could teach me to let go and just give him the wheel. I pray that I would let Him color my canvass. I pray that He would never leave my side even if I'm stubborn...

Life's Realization

While I was thoroughly ravishing my meal (ginataang alimasag na may kalabasa) the other day, I was watching a film starring Charlize Theron, Stuart Townsend, Dakota Fanning and Kevin Bacon. I still don't know the title but I know I've seen it before. Stuart Townsend was a medical person, um, I don't know if he's a doctor or he specializes something but Kevin Bacon was getting revenge by kidnapping Townsend's kid, Dakota. To make the long story short, good guys win. *laughs*


Anyway, Townsend's profession (though I don't know exactly what it was) made me ponder what I want in my life. My best friend is studying Medicine, and I'm not even a graduate. *sigh* Then , I thought of the things that made my life worthwhile... and it all summed up to one. I want to help other people. I may not doing enough things but it will be my life's goal. I may not be the best in my profession but if an opportunity presents itself, I would be willing to help anybody.


If I remember correctly, the things that I enjoyed doing were mostly people oriented. Like when I was in high school, I ran for Student Council and won the secretary position, that was in my Senior year. Okay, I'm going to enumerate some of the memorable things that I enjoyed doing, or some of my accomplishments. Hmmm.. When I was in nursery, my mom told me that I was in the honor roll, I was in third place, I think. Then in my elementary days, grade 3, I think, I won my first spelling bee, with the help of my team mate, Ken ( I think he did all the work though, hehe) I can't remember if it's in my grade 3 year, but I joined a declamation contest, I can still remember some lines.

 "His face, his face" 

*laughs* yup! that's it. That's why I lost that contest 'cause I can't remember my lines. hihi. Anyway, I joined another declamation after that and here are some lines to give you a clue..

 " Alms, alms, spare me a piece of bread. Spare me your mercy. I am child so young, so thin and so rugged... Why are you staring at me? Do you know my mother? Do you know my father? Did you know me 5 years ago? Yes, 5 years of bitterness have passed..." 

and that's all I can remember. (Here's a link to see the full piece) Okay. I think I joined the art club and the social science club and that was when I realize that I love art. I joined a poster making contest in my 6th grade and won. I can still remember that someone dumped my poster in the trash after it was displayed in the halls of our school. I cried  but it was all in the past. I remember my drawing was about the twin towers and Osama Bin Laden was falling off the top of the towers while the people below hold hands and unite around the globe. Haha! I know, cliche drawing but hey, at least I won. *winks*


 Now for my high school years, I joined the glee club, got active with my spiritual life, joined Student Fellowship and eventually became a Christian. It was in the 2nd year of my high school when my mom allowed me to go to a Summer camp hosted by the church of our school, and that year I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. After that, my life evolved in church and school. So yes, I'm a goody two shoes. 


Oh, I almost forgot, ever since grade school, I love bringing food for our recess because sometimes there's not enough time to go down and buy food in the canteen or sometimes we need to copy homework in our recess so we just eat in class. I remember that I'm always the one with the food and I love sharing it to them if I have spare. I think one trait my mom gave me was being generous with food. haha! Anyway, in my 4 years of highschool I get to direct 3 plays, I think. Florante and Laura, Noli Me Tangere and El Fili. Or was I the music director, I can't remember exactly but I used to direct plays in our Filipino class. I was also Emcee to one of our Linggo ng Wika, and I was partnered with the School President that time. We also participated in dance numbers and singing competition. Oh yeah, Chinese singing competition, I can still remember the face of the judges and how we practiced for it. Uhm... I also was part of the design team for our Teacher's day, it was themed like the Academy Awards with the red carpet and all. :) Every now and then I get called in the church to design some things.. haha.


For the conclusion, "makapal mukha ko" Hahaha! I think I'm an artsy fartsy person since I was a kid. I have no qualms about being in front of people, less stage frights.


So now, why did I say all those things? I just want to remind myself that I chose the right course for me. Advertising may have it's disadvantages but I know I love it even if I'm not familiar with it as much as other people do. I am the person who would love to help you even if I'm not in the limelight. (though sometimes I would like to be acknowledged)


In ending, I may not have a strong ambition like others who aspire to become the president of the country or own a billion's worth of company. I simply want to work and enhance my abilities to its fullest potentials and just help people with the ability God has given me. The best thing that would ever happen to my life is to fulfill God's work and be his hands and feet. I want to use my ability to help people see what I see in God or if possible, even more than I see God.


We walk in this beautiful earth and still not believe in the greatness of God. We see wonderful places and still not believe in its Creator. We don't even praise Him or some wouldn't even spare a glance at His compassion. This is the part when I say, I will come back with a heart for worship... I will come back Father God, I will, no matter what happens.

Here's the sitch.

You're not in my checklist. You were just an option, a friend for keeps, but here is the feeling that's tearing my brains out.

I tried not talking to you for a day but you always break my streak. The longest we haven't talk would be hours or so. *sigh* I have said this loads of time... Ayokong masanay. The thing is... I think I already did.

And now I long for you... I think about you everyday. This morning I woke up with you on my thoughts. I tried shaking off the feeling but it doesn't fade.

I'll try once again to avoid you, if it fails then there's nothing I can do. 

Hi blogger, it's been a while. You know how this goes, I'm off to rant again...

I have come to realize that I'm not ready to fall in love. I think that God was telling me that for the past years and I'm just turning a deaf ear. It's that or I'm just scared to fall... scared of feeling happy because you know you'll be sad again no matter what you do. I'm scared of making a fool out of myself when that person is not even worth my efforts. I'm scared to take the risk because I'm afraid of rejection. I'm a coward. I don't want to leap into the unknown, not knowing when I will land and how will I land or if I'd still be alive. There, I admit it. I. am. scared.

I was browsing and reposting in my Tumblr and I saw this photo...

It describes me. period. haha.

That's it for now. Let the photo explain what I feel today.

crazy stupid love

 I watched "Crazy, stupid, love" last saturday night with my friends. My friends treated us dinner because it's their birthday. Funny how they treated us, instead of us treating them. Anyway, we watched the movie after eating our fills. The movie was interesting and gave us unexpected twists. What's more interesting is while we were watching the movie we had a fire scare. In the middle of the movie, the cinema smelled funny, like burnt rubber or burnt electric wire. People started to walk out of the cinema, some asked the cinema officer what was the smell. Some of my friends panicked, though I'm worried, I didn't panicked because the fire exit was within my view, so I just sat there. AI also thought that I'm saved, so I don't care if I die at that moment. The movie continued regardless of the fire scare, so we might have skipped some juicy scenes, but no matter, we finished the movie (and we're still alive) that's the important thing.

Some of the scenes I liked was when Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone was about to make love but was postponed because Emma talks too much, instead they had a very long and intimate, and rather entertaining conversation. And it made me think... that's what I want.. to have a relationship with a person who will have loads of fun talking to me. Our conversations will not be strained but we will be volleying each other with our thoughts, emotions, dreams... (it's so cliche when i say this, but wth) it's as if as we are one.

I'm in my dreamy state again, hoping and romanticizing situations, but the hard part is waiting, waiting for the controversial "it" to come.

♫ The aftertaste is gonna break my heart, feels like it's over before it starts, The aftertaste is gonna break my heart... ♪


 Just felt like putting that in... anyway, here's another poem...

Here I go again
This feeling that I can't explain
I'm confused and amused
Thought I had enough
but I wanted more
Here I go again
Singing in the shower
and in the rain
reaping anxiety and
planting pain
Here I go again
This feeling that I can't contain
grappling like a hurricane
It's driving me insane.

 Another poem, another release, another catharsis. Same old dilemma but different people.

I'm rereading Hunger Games, just thought you might want to know. :P I still love Cinna. He ignited the flame and made Katniss the fire. He is one superb character, his quiet passion is what attracts me. He is brilliantly made.


That's all I have to say for now... Ciao!

The Hunger Games quotes

August 22,2011




"Deep in the meadow, under the willow
a bed of grass, a soft green pillow
lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes
and when again they open, the sun will rise.
Hear it's safe, here it's warm
hear the daisies guard you from every harm
hear your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true hear is the place where i love you.


Deep in the meadow, hidden far away
a clock of leaves, a moonbeam ray
forget your woes and let your troubles lay
and when again it's morning, they'll wash away.
Hear it's safe, hears its' warm
hear the daises guard you from every harm
Hear your dreams are sweet and tomorrow bring them true
hear is the place where i love you."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)










"In District 12, looking old is something of an achievement since so many people die early. You see an elderly person, you want to congratulate them on their longevity, ask the secret of survival. A plump person is envied because they aren't scraping by like the majority of us. But here is different. Wrinkles aren't desirable. A round belly isn't a sign of success."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"He became my confidante, someone with whom I could share thoughts I could never voice...In exchange, he trusted me with his."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"But the words are easy and soothing, promising tomorrow will be more hopeful than this awful piece o time we call today."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"In our world, I rank music somewhere between hair ribbons and rainbows in terms of usefulness. At least a rainbow gives you a tip about the weather."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"You have a... remarkable memory."
"I remember everything about you. You're the one who wasn't paying attention."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"She has no idea. The effect she can have."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"I noticed just about every girl, but none of them made a lasting impression but you."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"So I learned to hold my tongue and to turn my features into an indifferent mask so that no one could ever read my thoughts."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)




"Betrayal. That’s the first thing I feel, which is ludicrous. For there to be betrayal, there would have had to been trust first."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"I also want to tell him how much I already miss him. But that wouldn't be fair on my part."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"Let them go, I tell myself. Say good-bye and forget them. I do my best, thinking of them one by one, releasing them like birds from the protective cages inside me, locking the doors against their return."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"Then something unexpected happens. AT least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me. But a shift has occurred since I stepped up to take Prim's place, and now it seems I have become someone precious. At first one, then another, then almost every member of the crowd touches the three middle fingers of their left hand to their lips and holds it out to me. It is an old and rarely used gesture of our district, occasionally seen at funerals. It means thanks, it means admiration, it means good-bye to someone you love."
— Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games)







"My nightmares are usually about losing you. I'm okay once I realize you're here."
— Peeta Mellark (The Hunger Games)

Little Hands

Little Hands

These little hands
they knew of nothing before
caressing feeding bottles and soft pillows
yearning for the giver's touch
reaching for the unknown
never, fearing, always exploring
fragile and vulnerable.

These little hands
once played with poo
never minding the smell
or who's touching who
Oblivious to its destiny
enormous responsibility,
these little hands, let it be.


** for Poem X Poem's prompt. Theme: parts of the body.

My head was pounding while writing this so please excuse the lack of fluidity. Thank you.

Him and his dream

You are the mystery that begs to be solved
A shadow that tires of light
A monster that pleads to be loved and cherished
A storm that wishes for solace

You are the warm breeze that soothes my worries
A rock that exudes stability
A sunflower that beams with the sun
So innocent, so soft, so fragile

You don't have to do this alone
Let me decipher you, let me bring you home
Le me show you the trust you long
Let me in, please let it go.

You are worried, I know
I can fend for myself, I cannot let it show
I can make you wait, but it will hurt you
I've been betrayed, I won't be returning.

I want you to see the beauty in the ugly
Let me cross the bridge to your wall
Take it slow, I am in no hurry
I'll be here if you lose control.


** A conversation between lovers. Odd stanzas for the lover and the even stanzas for the partner.

Sep1



Nostalgic yellow,

I am weary.

The buds I long for,

leaves of merry.

Breathe no more

the scent of folly.

Take a swig

of the glum revelry.






** A late entry for the 4 seasons themed poetry challenge made up by my friends ralaine and francis. The gates are open for reviews. :)

*** Oh, and I was writing about autumn. hehe. :P

Another one... but it's untitled, i don't know what to call it yet. haha



Hold on,
Wait.
There's a story
Don't go to bed

I have tons to say
Won't you hear me?
Won't you stay?

It's barely bed time
talk to me
Don't let the demons
conquer my head
talk to me
if you don't want to see me
dead.

" goodbye to love" to "you should date"

I don't mean to be so dreamy this early morning but you see it all started with the Korean drama series called City Hunter. My cousin was watching it so I have no choice but to watch it too. The main character was trained to be emotionless, to not be too attached, to not feel, to be numb and sturdy for their revenge. His adopted father told him, "Do not trust, do not fall in love." I was resolved to not fall in love, so I plurk'ed it. Then the ripple began, my friend responded with a song from The Carpenters, "I'll never fall in love again". I replied with another Carpenters song... "Goodbye to love" 




I was prepared to greet my lunch with a bitter countenance but I saw this article from my friend on twitter entitled: "You Should Date..." and it made me dreamy once again. This is inspiring, it makes you hope for the best, but the what if's are swirling like flies on my head, pessimism takes over... and I won't mention them here for the fear of spreading bad vibes. Even if I do not write it here, you'll be thinking the same things with me, won't you? 


What inspired me in the article was the differentiation between character and personality. Oftentimes, similarities bring people together, but you'd see their true character after you've seen your differences with each other. 

The person I want you to date has character. When you’re young, all you’re looking for is personality. Charm. Compatibility in music and book taste and food preferences. I think these are all well and good but character is what sustains a relationship when all of these things change. Personality is ever-evolving, character grows and amplifies in time. Character is when a person does beautiful things without seeking credit. It’s when someone doesn’t quit — even if every fiber of their being begs them to. It’s the ability of someone to graciously expend back-breaking heart-wrenching love to someone who has disappointed and failed them. Character is that beautiful thing that gets molded over time and experience. Be someone with character and never settle for someone without it.

I'd like to quote this too...

But the person I want you to date is a person who knows how to resolve conflict especially when it blows up in both your faces. Their ego will never be too big to own up to their mistakes.

And here's another article, I think a response to the previous article mentioned... link
These articles makes you go, "awww" and "yes! that is so true" that's why I love reading them. They are not love experts but they have nice opinions about it.




I've been berating myself to wait for it, to not think about it, but my environment is not helping! I've scolded my mind to think of other things or to focus on serving God instead but my mind is weak, so is my heart.the heart can't help but be infatuated and be confused. No, I am not in love. I'll know when I have fallen, that is when I can catch a grenade and take a bullet for that person. Love for me is not a petty thing that would make you go giddy and make your heart all fluffy with butterflies on your stomach feeling. It is something that would be engraved on you, something that will reside in you till you die. 


All  I can do is let nature take its course, make and sometimes let things happen. Life is still full of surprises, we just have to be pliable to its flow, our heads pointed to the sun. 

Emily Bronte's Poems

I've always admired how Emily Bronte wrote Wuthering Heights and now her poems. Listed here are some of my favorites... :)

Love and Friendship by Emily Bronte

Love is like the wild rose-briar,
Friendship like the holly-tree --
The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms
But which will bloom most contantly?
The wild-rose briar is sweet in the spring,
Its summer blossoms scent the air;
Yet wait till winter comes again
And who wil call the wild-briar fair?
Then scorn the silly rose-wreath now
And deck thee with the holly's sheen,
That when December blights thy brow
He may still leave thy garland green.

If grief for grief can touch thee by Emily Bronte

If grief for grief can touch thee,
If answering woe for woe,
If any truth can melt thee
Come to me now!

I cannot be more lonely,
More drear I cannot be!
My worn heart beats so wildly
'Twill break for thee--

And when the world despises--
When Heaven repels my prayer--
Will not mine angel comfort?
Mine idol hear?

Yes, by the tears I'm poured,
By all my hours of pain
O I shall surely win thee,
Beloved, again!

The Old Stoic by Emily Bronte

Riches I hold in light esteem,
And love I laugh to scorn;
And lust of fame was but a dream
That vanish'd with the morn:

And if I pray, the only prayer
That moves my lips for me
Is, "Leave the heart that now I bear,
And give me liberty!"

Yes, as my swift days near their goal,
'Tis all that I implore:
In life and death a chainless soul,
With courage to endure

Hope by Emily Bronte

Hope was but a timid friend;
She sat without the grated den,
Watching how my fate would tend,
Even as selfish-hearted men.

She was cruel in her fear;
Through the bars, one dreary day,
I looked out to see her there,
And she turned her face away!

Like a false guard, false watch keeping,
Still, in strife, she whispered peace;
She would sing while I was weeping;
If I listened, she would cease.

False she was, and unrelenting;
When my last joys strewed the ground,
Even Sorrow saw, repenting,
Those sad relics scattered round;

Hope, whose whisper would have given
Balm to all my frenzied pain,
Stretched her wings, and soared to heaven,
Went, and ne'er returned again!

that's it for now... will post more later or in the following days. :3

Speech dedicated to those who failed

If you have read my previous blog entries, you would have an inkling of my school status. You may have also known that I have a plurk account and while browsing it, I saw a post from my friend on plurk. Here is the link.

I had goosebumps when I read that. it's encouraging and inspiring. It is something that I plan to achieve. I want to prove to the people who supported me that their help was not for naught. "tinamad" lang siguro ako.

Basta, I will not give up. I will graduate and I will continue to explore my capabilities, and if I am financially capable, i will study literature or get a masters degree. I will make the people who supported me proud and satisfied.

And of course, I will try my best to glorify God. This might not be His plan for me, but no matter, even if my plans won't go the way I wanted it to be, I'll keep holding on to God's promise.