Thursday, October 31, 2013

Two Frantic Days

Have you ever felt like a day isn't enough for your work? You know that you have organized your to-do list but you still have this nagging feeling that you haven't done enough work? Have you ever had the feeling that you shouldn't be enjoying the holidays because you have work to do?

For the last two days, I have never felt more productive in my life. I have a couple of rushed works that, by God's grace, I have finished on time. I'm just amazed at how God works, on how He answers prayers no matter how big or small they are. For two days, I am amazed at how God has sustained me.

Now, I am anxious and I have job that is needed to be done but my head is aching so I'm going to sleep because we have to go to the cemetery tomorrow. I'm praying that God would help me learn this one in an easier way. hehe

And I'm still praying for patience, humility, and discipline.



Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Plans for blog

I'm a forgetful person so I need to list this so that when I come browsing my blog I would see what I was planning.

Let's start with...

1. A section that I would label "the Pensieve" wherein I would put memories from the past or things that I want to remember in case I bump my head on a rock and lose my memory or something. 

2. Book reviews and movie reviews. This section has been long overdue. I have been planning it since mid year and still no updates about the books and movies I've read and seen. 

3. I need to update Doodle page. I think my entire blog needs updating but I keep forgetting. *cries*

4. Another section for a Bucket list or Things I want to do before I die. But I was thinking it would be sort of similar with my number one? no? 

5. Update my Fashion page and put in my "Ukay Finds." This idea has been incubating in my mind for quite some time now because I'm thinking of putting a section about my "Book-ay Finds" for books that I have purchased or found in book sales that is worth every cent, but I think I'm going to put that in the Book section, which is...

6. Another section just for Books...

Arrgggh! This list is getting longer as I type so I think I should stop here and try doing some of those updates.


Monday, October 14, 2013

What do I have to learn?


What do I have to learn, O God, before I understand this pain that you have bestowed upon me? I have felt it a couple of times already and I feel like I haven’t fully understand what you want me to learn. Is this the time where you break me? Is this it, Father?

Oh Father God, when will I learn it? I am tired of feeling the same way. I’m tired of being so distracted and confused when I feel like I’m leaning towards you again. I miss you so much, Father God and I wish that I could be with you now, but I know that work must be done. Please, Father, let the Holy Spirit work in me, Father, that I would always remember your Words, your advices.

I would gladly pray for this burden to be lifted but Father if this is part of your awesome plan in my life… I would only pray for strength to endure it and to learn from it. I ask for nothing more than your Guidance, Father. You alone knows me and my heart. I pray that You would be my strength. It might not be clear today but I know You hold my life therefore I am at peace. I’m just confused Father. My emotions are reigning in me and it is difficult.

Thank you Father God for the books that you gave me to help me ease some of my confused thoughts and for giving me friends who I know were inspired by you to counsel me when I needed it. I am eternally grateful to You. I love you.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Wait for the Lord

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." Psalm 24:14

I have never been more sure of what God wants me to focus on this year. I have been side tracked by potential romantic ventures but through God's guidance and a bucket full of prayers, God has reminded me to seek His kingdom first.

It is so hard to wait for it (that special someone) especially when you see so much potential in a prospect and when you see that his heart is with the Lord. God has counseled me and has been constantly reminding me that this is one of His lessons about patience and humility, because I have asked Him before about this and now He is slowly teaching me, and I am forever grateful.

Yesterday, I have been so confused because my feelings and my thoughts are not well with each other. I was scared and really bothered because I was really close to following my emotions once again. Yes, once again, because I have been in this place before and I was impatient, I saw an opportunity and I grabbed it without waiting for God's go signal. The result? My heart  was crushed.

These few weeks my heart has been bothered my emotions that I couldn't fully understand but through God's wisdom, through bible verses and books, God has reminded me to trust in Him and... to wait for Him, wait for His plan to unveil before my eyes and the only thing required for me to do is to continue searching for Him. My prospect might be a distraction today but who knows, God might be reserving him to be a blessing in my life. Whatever happens today, I plan to seek God first. I pray that He will guide me as I do so.

He has said it before...

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Matthew 6:33 

I have never been more excited in knowing more about Christ and in following His footsteps, not because I long for that special someone, but because of His goodness, His love, I want to know more about those things, because I feel like I've only seen parts of it. It is intoxicating and I want to learn more about Him. My heart wants to see more of Him and the way He is working in people. I have been blessed by His grace and I want to pay it forward. I want to let the people know that this is the God worth following. This is the God worth loving. This is the God who will never leave you. This is the God who will allow you to be hurt because He loves you. This is the God who has suffered before you have suffered. This is the Almighty God who has designed you and has known you before you were born. This God gave His ONLY Son so that you can live today... so that you can live with Him forever in all the glorious makings of heaven.

"For God so love the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

It is hard, the work is hard, but I am sure that it would be worthwhile. He has given me glimpses of what could happen through testimonies and in my life, and I ask myself, why wouldn't I trust this awesome, infinitely gracious and astounding, magnificent God?