Penguin

Ciao blogspot, I've missed you.  I wouldn't touch you if it weren't for my online friends. haha! We were talking about poems and  composition and stuff. So, "hello" blogspot for me again and "i'll come back to you later" tumblr.

I was supposed to write a sales report at this moment but i feel like i need to unload some of my mixed emotions. Before I delve into that, I am proud to say that I've made a new header for my blogspot. Yay for me! *clap clap*

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For three days straight, since friday, I was out till 10pm or 11pm.  What was I doing out? Last friday, I met up with my friend because he was going to watch the Miley Cyrus concert at MOA concert grounds. Saturday, I went to meet up with my friends in Megamall for the toycon. There was a Harry Potter booth and since we're HP fans we decided to go together and marvel at the 4 original costumes from the Harry Potter set. Sunday, I went to church inthe morning and Toycon again in the afternoon. I have met up with my church friends who do Cosplay, my friends from UST, my friends from Saturday's toycon with their costumes and my Powwow friends. I miss them already. :'(

I wish that Sundays would last longer than any other days.

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We were talking about Christina Perri yesterday and I am listening to her album. One song that my friends recommended me was "Arms" but I am drawn to "Penguins" haha. I  don't know why but I searched for the lyrics and here is what I found...

Can you find the time
to let your lover love you
He only wants to show you,
the things he wants to learn too
The hardest parts you'l get through
And in the end you'll have your best friend
Love like this may come once
Baby it's fate like a soul mate
He's your penguin
Baby it's fate
Baby it's fate not luck

Can you find the timeto let your lover hold youHe needs somebody to hold too,his loves strong and so trueHis arrow is aiming for youAnd he's the one that you were born to love
Love like this may come onceBaby it's fate like a soul mateHe's your penguinBaby it's fateBaby it's fate not luck
Let go, let go of time for you and ILet go, let go of time for you and ILet go, let go of time for you and I
Love like this is all I wantBaby we're fateLove like this may come onceBaby we're fate like a soul mateYou're my penguinBaby we're fateBaby it's fate not luck

There. I'm  not a believer of fate, or am i? haha! I don't know.  

Harry Potter Final Trailer.

The Final Harry Potter Trailer.
The movie that I anticipated the most this year. I can't wait for it but i hate that it will end. :"(
Thank you Harry Potter for being a part of my childhood.... :'(

wreck

The last time I posted here was on February. Sorry my blogspot, Tumblr captivated me. I'm back now for the mean time. hehehe.

As usual, I am feeling depressed, so I blog.

First off, I do not understand myself one bit. I am a mess. I do things impulsively. I can't even understand my own feelings. I am a wreck. A smiling wreck! 

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I can't understand why people treat me this way. Am I too nice, or am I just too gullible? Am I trying to fit in or am I trying to conform? Am I just too different?

Sometimes I just want to be indifferent.

downplay

This entry was triggered by my goddaughter's homework. It was about the figures of speech. Funny, I had to look them up in the net. hehe. Just for clarifications , of course. I have been keeping a blog for crying out loud and I don't even know what are the figures of speech?! no effin' way.  hahaha! Anyway, I volunteered to do her homework because I know that I could do it better.

What really made me write this blog is the fact that I had to downplay my abilities to make beautiful figures of speech (not bragging) into simple grade-school level ones. 

You know how authors make simple children stories and turn it into a thought provoking one, that's how I feel now with the homework. Downplaying. When you downplay, the quality is poor and it's not self- gratifying at all. In life, it's the same, never downplay because you might regret the outcome later. Grasp every opportunity as if it is the last, especially in Church Ministries.

Lately, I have been downplaying my spiritual life. Is there such thing??? Well, i think there is.. because I know I can do so much more for God but I end up serving Him in a mediocre way. It sucks, really, to serve with not giving your all. We are all called to glorify the One True God, but we are not facing the responsibility head on. 

Words can be easily said but it is hardly done.I think I'll just wait until God prods me hard, or maybe when He slaps my head hard, and wake me from this insanity. 

Mushy.

I'm tuned in to 94.7 while The Fray" is singing "how to save a life" at me. With a cup of warm coffee beside, I'm all set for ranting.

It's February, the love month, as they constantly remind me. You see it on the streets, the posters, everywhere is buzzing with the Valentine's fever.

To be honest, I've done little of flirting in my 21 years of existence. I am as what you call, dense and "torpe". One thing that might describe me at this moment it a song by White Stripes... the lyrics goes like this...


"Yeah, You don't know what love is
you just do what you're told..."


Truth is, I don't know what love is...
Am I in love when I think of him constantly?
Am I in love when I relate every little thing to his life?
Am I in love when he makes my heart flutter?
Am I in love or am i stupid enough to believe him even though my instincts tell me that he is lying?

I am writing this blog with one guy on my mind. He has been residing in my mind for years now. He doesn't know that, or does he?
I quote Peeta on this, he doesn't know the effect he has on people.
I know he has changed but, boy, every time I see him again, my heart goes bonkers.
I've had a bunch of crushes, distractions, i might say, but after I get tired of them, I come back to him.
We haven't talked for months and I don't know what he's been up to these past months. I miss him so much. He makes my heart ache. If you browse through my blogs, he will be the guy I'm talking about.

Commercial break: I swatted a mosquito on my screen. ew.

Anyway, recently I've been thinking and maybe, or I've known this all along... I haven't got over him yet. Twice he broke my heart. And still he makes it beat. Well, not him entirely.

Okay, another thing to discuss.
I have not been talking to God lately and my life sucked. It's true, really. When you stopped talking to God or fail on your relationship with God, You might as well be crippled. There's a void that can't be filled by human love nor by worldly pleasures. There's a spot in your heart that is reserved for God. It's like a light switch, God is the only being that can turn you on. Once the light is off, you feel scared, lost and confused. But with God, it's like a light being switched on, you see everything fall into place. You see your meaning in the world. It is really astounding how one moment I seem to drown into despair and the next moment driven by the Holy Spirit, I turn to praise God.

Patching a relationship is hard but as our pastor says, it's God who does the reaching, all we have to do is reach back. We are saved not because we earned it but because God chose us to be saved.
I don't know why I'm so confident that God will help me get back to my feet, when I should wallow in grief for the sins I've thrown at Him. I have sinned and I do not deserve His Grace yet He keeps showering it on me. I do not deserve it one bit, not even a milli bit. I am a fool who keeps on disobeying Him and yet He is so Merciful and so compassionate. I do not know what to do, I turn a deaf ear at him but He keeps on shouting advices. I turn a blind eye at Him but he acts out His instructions. I am not fit to be His servant yet He calls me.

I am torn. My mind in a battle. I am not doing well. I hope He saves me once again before I drown, again. Again. Again.

under construction

this blog is under construction.

I crapped on my thesis

I swear after I graduate, that is IF I graduate, I will buy my own laptop!


As usual, I start my blog with ranting for that is the purpose that I made one. Alright, ladies and gentlemen, imma let 'er rip!


Saturday.
My monitor gave up on me. So I asked my friend for an overnight so that I can use her desktop and finish off my thesis. The sleep over was all right and it did great for my ads. But I am still monitor-less.


Sunday.
I went home with my thesis in my pocket and with a mission to find a monitor. I rang up my good friend from high school who lives 3 blocks away to borrow their monitor which I am to return by 9am in the morning on Monday.


Monday. 
I bought a P950 monitor with a broad back from a surplus computer shop in Gilmore. I worked with it for hours til midnight, then I went off to sleep only to find my CPU not working in the morning. The day could not have been more crappier, right?! 


Tuesday.
CPU not working. Thank God my cousin allowed me to borrow her laptop. As soon as I plugged in to the net, i went off searching for Photoshop. Downloading took me the whole afternoon. Monitor crappy, CPU broke and crappy, and now the net is joining their league. What is this day? Bring more crap into Ana's day?! 


Now, I am full of this crappy vibe and I can't get back to my thesis. Only God can help me now. My head is now full of buzzing bees, who whispers "what ifs" and "why".  Why did I do this to myself? 


Thank you blog, I have unloaded some of my crappy feelings here to be archived. 


I am now wondering if I have studied the right course. If I am really meant for Advertising. They say that what fills your mind when you wake up in the morning is the thing you want to do the most. I wake up every morning wishing that my thesis was done. 


I wish I was a gifted writer instead. I really wish that.

a bad habit of moi

I am supposed to be on photoshop mode but here I am typing away in this blog. This has become a bad habit of mine. Damn you social networking, but I love you anyway! *sigh*


Okay, so I bought a planner last year before Christmas and I am proud to say that I am writing in it! :D Yay! The cute thing about my planner is it's cute! hahaha! It's smaller than the starbucks planner so it's very efficient for me 'cause my bag is always heavy with coins and trash! :P It has a cute design too. It is cute. yes, it is. That is the word for it. Cute. Oh, add in "adorable" too. It's cute and adorable. heehee.


I am blogging because of lack of motivation. My thesis checklist is in front of me and I know what to do with... crumple and tear it to bits! *evil laugh* but no, i'm not going to that. *sigh*
Though I want to. But then, what will happen to my thesis? ugh! theshits!!! 


Lately I have been listening to Bruno Mars. Yes, I've only listened to him after my cousin downloaded some songs on my itunes.  So thanks to her, Bruno Mars has another listener. I specifically like his song "Grenade". It is just so dramatic and emotional. *applause* I think that's a trait of most Filipino singers, or half-blood Filipino, or 1/4 Filipino, whatever, I think that's a trait of most Filipinos, the emotion when they sing. The passion and the story in their songs make people love them. I am not saying that other countries do not sing with passion, i'm just saying that most Filipino bloods have this emotional sting to their songs. err, well, that's just my opinion. :P


What I miss most is the part of my childhood when I don't care what people think and the time when I don't have to think of responsibilities. I miss the part when I wanted to grow up fast and when I wasn't aware of the real world.


And there you go, another episode of my random thoughts. *bows*

Photo torture

Here I go again with my ranting. 

A photograph. A simple piece of memoir made from a device called camera. It can be heart warming and smile forming but at times it can be devastating. A simple piece can be a very brutal torture. 

A photograph I saw earlier,

Not of me,

Not of her,

But you two together.

I flip, I scan, I grimace

Your photos seem endless. 

I grin, I frown, I grit,

My, my, I could have a fit.

I should be doing something

Instead I'm frowning.

You sure have a way in me,

You bastard, you'll be the death of me.

*exhales* You sure have a way in me, given that I only saw a picture of you together. The sad part is... it is still you. 

happy new year?

This is the saddest New year I have experienced. I try to smile and greet everyone a happy new year but my heart cries. I see my family physically together but their thoughts and actions are apart. One tries to mend the broken bond, but the other hesitates. 

Blow the "torotot" to ward of the evil spirits they say, but i blow that thing to release a bit of uneasiness and melancholic emotion inside me. 

I see people smile on the T.V. Are those smiles real? Or do they keep a facade like I do. 

OH, indeed, it is a Happy New Year. 

Bakit ganun? may mga bagay na gusto mong kalimutan pero di maiwasan. Babalik at babalik parin sila maski anong gawin mo. Bakit may mga bagay na ang hirap alisin sa buhay? Na kapag inalis mo magmimistulang tingting sa kusina, ginagamit lang kapag kailangan.
Bakit minsan ang daming tanong sa utak mo at hindi mo sila masagot?
Bakit bakit bakit?

The beginning of an ending.

*Warning: Spoilers below*

This post is way overdue. I have watched HPDH last monday, november 15 andI have only blogged this now. I apologize to my blog conscience for postponing this entry. Without further ado, here is my take on Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. 

Like most of the Harry Potter movies, we begin with Privet Drive, where Harry lived his childhood days before Hogwarts. Harry, who was branded as "the boy who lived" , was now "The Chosen One" and further more in the movie, "The Undesirable One". The movie started with an aura of knowing darkness. It is like Lemony Snicket saying that if you watch further, you will see a series of unfortunate events. And so we shall. 

Hermione's family. Tears fell instantly when I saw Hermione  obliviate her parents. I sadly love this scene because the director , for me, is saying that Hermione would lay down her life for the Wizard world. It is not Harry's fight anymore, it is also theirs. These are dark times indeed, and Hermione's cleverness/readiness will prove their worth as the story progresses. This scene was so moving because it portrays a sad acceptance of what to come.

The 7 Potters. NO doubt about it, Harry Potter's visual effects are pleasantly improving. I was laughing when Hermione changed into Harry. Daniel Radcliffe imitated her well! :)

Flight from Privet Drive. I was expecting that I would have a chance to take a glimpse of what happens to each of the 7 Potters. How George got his hole, how Mundungus Fletcher fled. But I think it also unnecessary since we have a lot of ground to cover. 

Hedwig dies. It was a nice twist to have Hedwig died because she saved Harry. I have no qualms about that. 

What I like about this movie is that it mixes a heart wrenching scene with some humor and you can purely laugh at the pun. That was what I saw when George's ear was shot by a spell. My eyes were brimming with tears from Hermione's obliviate scene and Hedwig's death but George's "Saint-like" joke was still funny. Kudos to the red headed twins!

The Kiss. Another nice twist, purely unexpected that George would come marching in when Ginny and Harry was kissing. *clears throat* But! Ginny is a little feisty here, don't you think? Having Harry zip her dress? *raises an eyebrow* All right, all right, I just want to be Ginny at that moment, snogging Harry, the man of my dreams!!! 

Rufus. I did not particularly liked Rufus Scrimgeour's acting, for me, it's kind of gay. I was expecting something hard like The Fire Lord in The Last Airbender, someone tougher. But i have nothing against the actor. I don't why I saw some gay-ness. Oh well, never mind. I think I'll watch the movie again. harharhar.

Ministry of Magic. One twist I liked was the part where Ron kissed the woman on trial. Hahahaah!

Ron and the Horcrux. I applaud Ron for his performance in this scene. Rupert Grint did a great job! This was what I imagined Ron would be doing. Nice!

The dancing.  Most might see this scene unnecessary but I see it important. It keeps in touch with reality. They are after all 17 year olds, and they try to lighten things up. Harry was more of a brother to Hermione and this scene proves how tight their relationship is. It's like adding fuel to Hermione's obliviate scene. 

Horcrux. All right. This was epic. I was holding my breath when Ron was battling with the Horcrux. Torrid kissing there! 

 Wow. That was really jaw dropping. If I was Ron I wouldn't be able to kill the Horcrux. Movie version was great!

Dobby. We all know that Dobby dies.

Two lines that made me bawl...

"Dobby never meant to kill anyone..Dobby only meant to maim or seriously injure"

"Such a beautiful place..to be with friends. Dobby is happy..to be with his friend...Harry Potter."

THAT is just sad! Most of the HP fans I've talked with bawled at that scene, or at least got teary-eyed. If you watched Chamber of Secrets and you've seen Dobby's history, you'll know why we were so touched by this scene. 

The fact that Dobby died also made us realize that the Potter Franchise is really at an end. We have to wait for one more movie and then it's goodbye. UNLESS! they make back stories of characters which we would love to watch. :)

My overall rating for this movie is... OUTSTANDINGLY EPIC. More emotional than the Half-blood Prince and more engulfing. Scenes are not to be missed out. It is worth watching the second time, the third and the fourth time. Some may say that it resembles to other movies they have watched, I say, "This is Harry Potter, and that makes it different."

Thank you J.K. Rowling for giving us another world to immerse in.

 

 

Somebody loved

I had to blog this one out.
To tell you the truth, I am having a hard time patching my relationship with mom. One reason is she has this annoying factor that makes you want to walk out on her... I know, i'm cruel by saying that. But let's face it. All of us had rough times with our parents. Everyone of us has those times when you think they don't effin' understand you or your feelings, but the truth is, sometimes they do know, that's why they tell you not to do things. We are proud creatures by nature, we think we are right all the time and most of us are trapped in our own little bubble. Each of us see things differently, we learn things differently and that's what parents need to understand.


Anyway, the main reason I said I have to blog this out is because it seems timely... or i don't know, it just struck me...
I was watching Glee yesterday and the episode's title was "Grilled Cheesus" The episode is about religion and what not.Kurt's dad is in a coma and his friends are trying to convert him or make him believe that there is a God. But he insists on believing what he wants to. The truth of the matter is, people can't live without having someone to look up to. We need something supernatural, something that gives us hope to survive this wild jungle of a life.
That was yesterday... and tonight, I heard Weepies playing on my itunes. I google the lyrics and the video and got this one.





There was a caption together with the lyrics below that video by JudgedJulez that inspired me to write this blog...

My Mommy died of cancer 6 Days before Christmas in 2007. 

This is the song I heard about twohundert times since these days. 

I love it coz it remembers me of good times. 

I wanna make this video really clear thats why I juts added the lyrics to a black background.

UPDATE: I wanna thank everyone for there very lovely comments. It's brighten up my days.

Thank you

Lyrics:

Rain turns the sand into mud

Wind turns the trees into bone

Stars turning high up above

You turn me into somebody loved

Nights when the heat had gone out

We danced together alone

Cold turned our breath into clouds

We never said what we were dreaming of

But you turned me into somebody loved

Someday when we're old and worn

Like two softened shoes

I will wonder on how I was born

The night I first ran away from you

Now my feet turn the corner back home

Sun turns the evening to rose

Stars turning high up above

You turn me into, you turn me into

You turn me into somebody loved

Somebody loved, Ooo, somebody loved

My mom asked me for a date on Sunday and I said yes... With the busy life i'm living I rarely have time for my mom. Sure, i get to see her everyday, before i go to work, when i get home, but we have rare moments where we just talk and sit down without the mention of money... It's kinda sad, i know, but it's the truth. 


The number of days i live in this earth is not multiplying by the minute... so i better enjoy and live life to the fullest. 
we've got to love to the fullest....

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Yes, I'm a big Harry Potter fan. I grew up with the Harry Potter in movies. I was enthralled by Daniel Radcliffe's bright eyes and oh so charming smile. And so, as the final installment approaching, I am deeply sadden by the fact that I have no more to look forward to after the 2 parts have been released. November 19 is marked on my calendar no doubt about it. As I have commented in various Harry Potter, THIS is going to be epic. Watching the trailer brought goosebumps on my skin. You must watch it to believe me. The effects were beyond my expectations. I just hope the movie surpasses the trailer. Before I utter more praise to HP7, i give you the HD trailer of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part1 

Now you know what I mean.

And now I post pictures.

The following pictures I am going to post came from here http://www.fanpop.com/spots/harry-potter I do not own any of them.

Hp7 DH Calendar

Deathly Hallows Poster

DH still photos

Promos 2011 calendar

19 years later... pictures.

Albus Potter

Hugo Weasley

Rose Weasley

Draco and Astoria

Scorpius Malfoy

Just Random Pictures... 

Can't wait for Nov.19 Let's have a look out for more HP news!! Tha's it for now! ;)