Sunday, August 5, 2012

Release

Anyone who knew me knew that I had a lot of crushes but only a few knew of the “big” ones.” I have two kinds of crushes: the small ones, where I liked them because they were adorable or hot (these are the guys that my best friend and I called “play crush”), and the big ones, where I liked them because of many things… Let’s just say that the big ones were what you call infatuation.

I have a ritual with my big ones whenever I get crushed, and I am expecting to be crushed, because let’s face it, that’s why they are called “Crush” because they will crush you. Anyway, back to the ritual. I cried after being crushed. Don’t we all?

So what happens after this ritual? Usually, I move on. Maybe that’s why I cried, because I have realized that it was time to let go of my infatuation. That it was time to move on because he was not the one for me. It was time that I gave up any hopes. Mostly, I cried because I felt silly of getting my hopes up.

I wonder if I’m not likeable, or am I hanging with a wrong crowd and no one understands me? But I bet most of us feel that way. Misunderstood.

Whatever happens, I’ll trust God. He knows me more than I do.