Move

I need to move or else I’ll suffocate.

I am not a good conveyer of my emotions when I’m in front of the people I love. It isn’t supposed to be like that? Don’t I have to be fully expressive when I’m with them? Why is it that I’m holding back?

I am making myself miserable if I stay stagnant. I have to experience the life outside my bubble. I have to see what the world offers. I have to explore my potential and my limits. I hate to say it but I’m not the one who will settle.

The problem is I’m tied because of my financial difficulties. I am bound to stay here for a year unless they sever my ties. I must admit that I am giving them a poor quality performance and I know it is selfish of me, but I can’t help it. I like the people, I like the hours, I like the liberty but I don’t like what I’m doing. I’ll end up hating my job if I don’t get out of it. Worst, I’m going to hate myself… and I think that worst has come.