Thursday, August 5, 2010

Just a random thought...

I was pouring water into my tumbler, when a sudden idea struck me. I am in need of a role model. Someone I could look up to. a real person, not somebody I read or saw in books. Somebody who is alive and can interact with me. Somebody who can answer my questions and never think the questions I ask to be dumb. Somebody who finds time to comment at my random thoughts. Someone who'll not find me weird because of my interests.
Someone who'll encourage me to speak my mind and say, "yes, i've been there, and I suggest you do this"

I am a frustrated writer... but i guess all i need is an encouraging supporter... An encourager for my sudden burst of thoughts...
Truth is, I want to be a writer. I am dazzled by words. I feel welcomed by words every time I see them. But the sad fact is, i am not a writer. I want to be, but it is not my forte. I have said in my plurk that I am a jack of all trades and indeed I am. I know tidbits of lot of things but have not master any of them. I know how to write, to read, to play the piano, to design clothes, to draw, to teach, to sing, to dance, to narrate, to act, to host,... but I can't seem to find something that I can excel in. That is the sad fact about my life. Yes, you can put me anywhere and still perform good, but I do not excel. I do not know what my future stable career will be, but I know that someday I will excel, by God's grace, i hope I do. 
I am an optimist. I always look at the brighter side of things.

Do you know the feeling of being in the background? The feeling  when a task is finished with you involved in it, supporting the main players? I think that's the feeling of accomplishment. It feels like you've done something right even if your face isn't shown. 

Life will always be complex and difficult. You don't have to be the front act or the main performer to feel the sense of accomplishment, or to feel contentment. You just need to see what your job is worth and see how it is helping others. And seeing the people you've helped, seeing that you have this job without hurting or stepping on anybody, it makes all the effort and sacrifice worth having.

Now, why do i always end in a positive note?
As I have mentioned, I'm an optimist.