First point, I had 4 cakes which really makes my birthdays happy.
Second, I have been secretly longing for a surprise birthday greeting and my officemate did this without knowing my longing. So, yay!
Third, I got to spend in with my family and relatives, because it fell on a Sunday. I got to spend it with church mates as well.
So yeah, my birthday this year was not a lonely one. Thank you Lord.
But since I am writing here again, it means I have emotions and thoughts I want to release... I have been feeling like my usual optimistic self for maybe two months or so, but lately, I have been feeling bleak again. I feel irritated at people who I am not supposed to be irritated. I feel worthless again and that I am not doing my tasks well. I feel like I am not needed in the world and that it would be best if I disappear. I am sure my friends will recover from their loss... But will I be a loss?
I feel suffocated yet I know that this will pass, that this is just an attack for me to lose my identity in Christ. So I tell myself that I am a child of God. Nothing will separate me from His love.
May God help me remember His promises and not succumb to sin.
