Some people wait for the end of the year to reflect on their life. I usually do it on my birthday and it usually makes me depressed. I should be happy I’ve lived this long, but I’m comparing myself to the pace of the world and that’s the reason why it makes me depressed. I set expectations on myself that are sometimes too high and when I don’t achieve them, I get disappointed with myself and it cripples me.
There is an unending war in my head and the only thing that keeps it intact is God’s grace.
Every year I do a birthday post to remind me what I’ve felt and the things that I am grateful for. One thing is for sure… I am immensely thankful for God’s grace and His sustenance. I would cease to exist without Him. I am overwhelmed again by the love from my friends. They are God’s gifts to me. I will forever be wallowing without them.
What else? Hmmm… I did not do anything significant on my birthday except hung out with my cousins. We watched movies, ate a lot, and talked. It was a chillax day but when the night came, it became stressful because I was faced with deadlines that I brought upon myself.
What’s on my head right now?
This quote I posted on fb…
“The ship of my life may or may not be sailing on calm and amiable seas. The challenging days of my existence may or may not be bright and promising. Stormy or sunny days, glorious or lonely nights, I maintain an attitude of gratitude. If I insist on being pessimistic, there is always tomorrow. Today I am blessed.”
― Maya AngelouI am blessed and I thank you Father in Heaven for all of the pain and joy You have allowed me to experience here on earth. Thank you for the wonderful and exquisite people I have in my life. Can't wait to be with You someday, but while I'm here, please help me to hope, persevere, and to spread Your light and love.
My head is having a hard time to focus, my heart is in turmoil, I keep praying to God but I feel like my ears of my heart won’t listen properly. May God grant me peace and joy in Christ His Son. May His plans prevail and may I be more accepting of His will in my life.