Say Geronimo!

God answers prayers no matter how petty or how irrelevant it seemed to others. He wants you to enjoy life and to see how He loves you.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend and I noticed Sheppard's free concert posters at SM MoA. I was doubtful because, duh, free concerts are rare nowadays unless the artist is really passionate about music, it's a publicity stunt or an advetising campaign. Anyway, we decided to go because apparently it was really free.

The day of the event came and I was planning to go off work early. I wasn't able to. The concert was supposed to start at 6pm but it started at around 7:30pm and I was still on the train. Thank God that my friends went early and had me listen to Sheppard via phone. I was immensely grateful for that because I wanted to hear them sing live and I would take it even if it's through the phone.

As each song I heard Sheppard sing via phone, my heart sank because I realized that I might never hear them sing live again for free. I was in the taxi when I prayed to God to let me hear at least one song... just one song, Say Geronimo! And this is the part where I tell you that God answers prayers.

My friend told me that the set list was almost done, maybe one or two songs left. I prayed fervently to God, just one, let me hear just one song. As soon as the taxi stopped at our destination, I paid him and ran towards the music hall. My heart was pumping loudly because of excitement and anticipation. I heard the crowd singing with the band, I felt their energy. I was still at the phone with my friend and was telling at them that I'm near the area and voila! I'm in. I'm at the concert! They were singing their second to the last song and guess what?! I got to hear them sing Say Geronimo live!

What made me elated was the fact that God answered my prayer in a matter of minutes,  the song was just a bonus. He made it possible. If I was late by a minute I wouldn't experience the song fully. But wait there's more!

Not only did He gave me a song to appreciate but He gave me two more songs for encore! I asked for one song and God gave me two! By this time I am in awe. Even though the songs were not really God glorifying... the experience made me see Him again. It made me ponder of His love for us and His great timing.

This was a great night. I thank God for the friends He gave to make this more memorable. I thank God for the lessons through this concert. And I thank God that even though we forgot to take a photo, we had a grand time!

Oh yea, I took one photo of the stage but forgot to take other pictures because I was enjoying their songs too much.

You Got Me Smiling

Woke up in the morning
With you in my head
I thank God I'm alive and I'm breathing
Because you got me smiling

On my way to work
With my headphones on
I nod my head to the music playing
Hey, it's our song and you got me smiling

And here I am
Thinking of our talks
This poem that I'm writing
It's for you, I think I'm falling.



Inspired by the song of Sheppard called Smile. :)

Back to Blogger

I'm back! Saw a blogger app on google play so here I am though I'm a bit torn between maintaining my tumblr account and blogging here. What to do? Hmmm...

Not for me

 

He’s perfect but he’s not for me.

I have found a man who almost completed my checklist. He fell short at the age arena. And it sucks because people has been telling me that we “click” but the age thing was just the hindrance and maybe we could just wait it out and see what happens. I say, it’s not the age that prevents an “us” from happening. It’s him.

Unless he moves nothing would happen. Or unless God moves His hand, nothing will happen.

But see, there’s a problem. I’ve fallen for him. I have felt what the other people felt about us. There was a connection, but I doubt it would deepen. It’s just sad because I know it is one-sided.

I guess this will be another addition to the list of my heart breaks. Still I thank God for giving them because I get to learn something.

I remember praying for someone who I can work with in my ministries. Someone who has the same passion for music, books, and God. Someone who could make me focus more in being Christ-like. Someone who has the patience to understand my roots and my quirkiness. I prayed for someone to be my partner in life so that we can testify God’s love through our relationship. I wanted my relationship to be a part of my worship as well.

You know what, instead of praying for this someone to fall for me, I should be praying for my heart. It is distracted yet again. May the Lord help me focus on His words and His love alone. May I thirst for Him earnestly everyday.

 

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By the way, I have been blogging on my Tumblr account since December 2015. I made a Tumblr account because I couldn’t spot a blogger app on my android phone. Since it’s easier posting photos on Tumblr and since it was the only “blogging” app that looked reliable for my phone, I decided to use it.  Visit www.amayoca.tumblr.com to see more of my posts.

One Thing Remains

The owl in me was keeping me awake. I could not concentrate on the project that I was supposed to be doing, so I took the Silver Sharpie beside me and began doodling a line in the song that was on my playlist. The song's title was One Thing Remains. The lyrics was pretty repetitive but it was heartfelt. 

Everytime this song plays on my music list, I am reminded of how enormous God's love is, that there is nothing that can take us away from His love. Death was conquered by His great love. 

When times are hard and things are bleak, remember His love and His promises for they will never fail.

"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." --- Romans 8:37-39

Stars

I could not remember when did I grew fond of stars. I used to doodle hearts on my notebooks instead of stars when I was in grade school. It evolved into flowers in high school, then I started to doodle less girly things when I was in college, but I couldn't remember when did I grew fond of stars.

I have posted before that I like looking at the stars. Everytime I would come home late, I would tilt my head up and marvel at these heavenly bodies. I would do that while walking, so that would give me a couple of minutes to admire the sparkling sky. What boggles me is my fondness with these wonderful beings. Together with my fondness of them, I like hearing about them. Most of the songs I love are about stars or has the word "stars"in their title or lyrics, like Starlight, Yellow, A Sky Full Of Stars, Catch A Falling Star, and other more. When and how did this fondness began?

Nevertheless, I sincerely thank the Lord for blessing us with these enchanting diamond drapery on our night sky.

Posting from an iPad

An awesome and generous friend gave me an iPad because she wanted me to play clash of clans with her. They had one that was not in use for years so she gave it to me! Yaaaaaay! How cool is that? I assured her that I wouldn't use it just for games but for other things too. I'm so grateful for this iPad!

I feel like I'm babbling again, but I just want to try if blogging from this device works. Let's see!

If Only I

"... and I'd talk to you if only I could speak

and I'd dream of you if only I could fall asleep."

- Jon Mclaughlin, If Only I

There are times when we would commit the mistakes we've done before and it's too late when we realize it. There are times when we'd commit these mistakes thinking that we have learned our lesson but we haven't. 

To someone I used to like...

I was willing to overlook your flaws and I was so willing to only look at your flairs, but you see I was blinded by a longing. I was longing for someone who I could share my moments with and have my own little bubble with, someone I could have the pleasure of talking until reality beckons us, or someone who would stay with me in silence. I was longing for someone's presence in my life and I was so glad that I stopped wishing it was you. I was so glad that I woke up from my infatuation and that I know who I should be longing for.

We both have things to learn and I think I have learned mine. I fervently hope that you have learned yours as well before any regret happens. Nevertheless, I thank God for letting me meet you and know you. For without you, I wouldn't have known what I was looking for. I would still put you in a pedestal that you don't deserve. You were meant to live in a chapter of my story and I have turned my pages to write the next one. You were a character in passing and I'm glad of it.

I Know Where I Want To Go

I know where I want to go
I want to go to new places
And see different faces
To figure out puzzling mazes
And fill out empty spaces

I know what I want to be
I want to be a better me
To fill a life full of glee
To not wallow in misery
And to be satisfied in the thought of eternity

I know who I want to marry
Someone funny and jolly
Someone who would keep up with me
What times are hard, he would not leave my side
He would hold my hand and remind me of
The God who we love and who is alive

Ways to Go

 

Most of my blog posts were inspired by songs (I may not have mentioned it but most of them were) and this one was inspired by the “feel good” groove of Grouplove’s Ways To Go. I was nodding to the beat when it dawned on me that I haven’t blogged since July, so here I am writing on my eventful August.

(Open Season by High Highs on my background)

My August started with our company retreat. I was on a spiritual high because I was reminded yet again of God’s promises and what it He wanted us to do. I wanted to project God’s love through my ministries so I volunteered. I stood up and ran towards Effie Trinket who was on the stage holding a piece of paper and shouted, “I VOLUNTEEEERRR!”

I’m kidding. Of course, Effie Trinket wasn’t in our retreat.

I only texted someone and told him that I wanted to help in a particular ministry. He said, yes. Lo and behold, my August was swamped with meetings and practices. But I am grateful because I get to serve Someone I love.

Speaking of love, let’s get into that arena. Last month, my heart and mind was still at war. I was still raw and butt hurt and I was unforgiving, but God was nudging me to talk it out with Him, and I did. I spat all my hurts and my anxieties concerning my love life and you know what, He listened and He calmed me. It was one of the sweetest experience I had with Him. From an angry and miserable woman, I became more accepting and forgiving. I have accepted that I was being impulsive and impatient, and it was one of the things that I have to learn in this phase.

I have decided (again) to wait it out. I would not make a move. I would let God do all the moving. Some of my friends would say that it would be a stupid move, that nothing would happen if I don’t move. But I have decided that I would wait. I want to do nothing except for the things that God wanted me to do, and so far, His instructions were to wait on Him. So I’m focusing on my ministries and in my relationship with Him.

One of the highlights of my August were my family’s and my best friend’s birthday. I cooked for my mom on her birthday. It was a simple dish. White sauce and pasta. I remembered that she used to cook the same thing when I was younger so I cooked one for her. I bought my cousin ice cream naman on her birthday. I didn’t cook for my best friend’s birthday because she treated us dinner. We had a grand time eating Filipino cuisine at BGC (I forgot the resto’s name) and we had ice cream afterwards. 

So there, I have updated you, my blog, with the highlights of my August.

 

Ah yes, one more thing, I am 7 books behind my reading challenge schedule and I’m feeling bad because I haven’t finished a book for July. What is happening with my reading life?! rawr! Anyhoo, I’m currently reading Stardust by Neil Gaiman and I am hoping that I would finish reading it this month.

 

Ciao.

Donate

This thought has been on my mind for quite some time...

on the event that I die, I want all possible organs to be donated to any hospital or to people who need them.

I also want to be cremated, that's why I wanted to donate any of the possible limbs or organs in my body to be put in good use. If my family were to face a difficult decision of keeping me alive, I want them to think of the greater good. I would love to be able to help people and to help them know more about Christ, even if it means that I would die.

I know that it would be a hard thing to decide upon. I do not know what the future holds for me. I might die in a second or after I'm done writing this blog, but one thing I am sure of, I know who holds my tomorrows. Whatever happens, I am glad to be part of His plan. 

The 2nd Law

The 2nd Law is the 6th album of MUSE released on 2012. I could still remember the hype of the Musers when it came out. Some did not like the album because they don't like dubstep. Some liked it. Some said that it has too much Queen on it. No matter what people said, I liked it. Loved it! I loved how MUSE experimented on their albums. By the way, this was the first MUSE album I have on cd and I plan on buying a tangible copy of the other albums as well.

The first three tracks were my top 3 favorites in the album. My favorite track would be Madness, 2nd would be Panic Station, 3rd for Supremacy. Every time I hear it, I feel my head bobbing to it. I loved the rhythm of the song and the elements in it.

I was listening to a spotify playlist and it played Madness, and I realized that even though it was released two years ago, it could still perk me up. I look forward to their next album and what would their inspirations be.

I am on my windowsill

I am on my windowsill
looking afar
wondering about places
or doors ajar

I am on my windowsill
Sitting and waiting
for the doors of my heart to open

I am on my windowsill
daring anybody to come near

I am on my windowsill

There were times when all we wanted was to be left alone. Whether it be under the sheets of your bed or a favourite nook in your room, all we wanted was to be left alone with our own thoughts.

There were those times too, when we were overwhelmed by our emotions that we could not distinguish what we feel. They were all mixed up that they made you numb, until you go into your corner and be at it for some time. Slowly, you would unravel each emotion and the reason behind it. In the process of unravelling, you  would find yourself wallowing on each emotion. Then, you would come to a point where you would realize that wallowing was pointless, and then you move on.

There were those times too, when you were wishing you were blogging something more sensible and informative, but you just wanted to post a blog not for post counts but for the mere reason of posting your thoughts somewhere other than your laptop (which would fail you some day) or your brain (which eventually would cease to work... someday) or for the reason that you wanted someone to read your post and empathize with what you're writing and that you are not alone.

Date the girl who waits

I saw this article from a post on facebook and I'm reposting it here because I can relate to the girl that the author, J Cheong, was describing. It's an interesting read because the first paragraph already fits. I know that girl, I know those habits, I know that heart, and some of the things listed below were my thoughts, my habits, and were one of the joys in my heart.

Date the girl who waits. She knows good things are worth waiting for. Find her not on Tinder, Ok Cupid or Skout. She’s too busy living life to be filtering good lookers online or chatting up strangers behind a screen. Instead, find her smiling to herself as she browses through books in an indie book store.  Find her laughing heartily in a group of friends at a cafe in town.

The girl who waits is one moment the sweet girl next door, and the next moment, the life of a party.

It’s easy to spot the girl who waits. Oblivious to her surroundings, she charms those around her with her confidence and her bubbly personality. You know you’ve found the girl who waits when you see a girl happy just being herself. When you see her, start a conversation and make her laugh. You can be certain it’s her if she infects you with joy without even trying.

The girl who waits doesn’t worry or envy when she sees her friends happily in love. Because deep down she knows it’s a matter of time before she gets her turn.

She’s confident enough to not to settle with just anyone, because the girl who waits is the girl who loves not when she’s lonely. The girl who waits, understands the difference between being alone and being lonely.

Ask her out on a date. Know she’ll refuse because chances are, she’s got plans of her own. But don’t stop trying, because when she finally opens up to you, you will realize that the wait was worth the while.

Date the girl who waits. She’ll never take you for granted. After months or even years of holding out for the right guy, appreciation and commitment come naturally. She won’t back out of the relationship after years of dating, citing reasons of uncertainty of whether you’re the one, because you know she has done everything she has needed to as a singleton and she has met sufficient guys to know you’re the one she wants to be with. She’ll be thankful for every moment with you because the activities she once had to do alone, she now has you as company.

Take her out on a date. You’ll experience appreciation and desire when she naturally reaches out for your hand. Date the girl who waits, because when she finally entrusts you with her heart, you know she’s true to you.

Fall in love with the girl who waits. She has gone through sufficient heartbreaks to know how to love. She understands the delicate balance of personal space and couple time. Having been a swinging bachelorette, you can be certain that she has a life of her own. She won’t be clingy and neither will she stop you from hanging with the boys. She’ll be the best friend who taunts you to make your soccer watching experience fun but she’ll also be the sweet girl who’ll cuddle you at home on a rainy day.

The girl who waits would have a life of her own. She’ll tell you about her backpack adventures. She’ll take you to her favorite hideouts. She’ll strum you a song on her guitar and watch her favorite movies snuggling up with you. She’ll take you to meet her friends. She’ll hold your hand and take you on new escapades.

Date the girl who waits, because she is the girl who knows what she’s looking for. If she chooses to be with you, you can be definite it wasn’t because of convenience or loneliness.  Treasure the girl who waits, because she, who doesn’t settle despite it all, is the girl who will love you for you.

Love the girl who waits. She’s confident and happy by herself, but chooses to let you in despite knowing you could very well hurt her. If she forsakes her freedom for you, keep her. If she can love you without any baggage from her previous heartbreaks and failed relationships, don’t just love her back.  Love her, and even more.

Maybe you’ve met her, maybe you haven’t. But when you finally do, don’t let her go.

source: http://jcatalogue.com/date-girl-waits/

Something Good

 

It is in the wee hours of the morning that I usually get pumped up with ideas and whatnot, and maybe a little help from coffees or teas. I know it’s unhealthy but I guess, it is more beneficial emotionally than physically.

I have been storing up a bundle of feels lately. I have been wallowing in the pain that I have forgotten about the good things I would get from this experience. What experience, you might wonder? I would say, it was an experience common to us mortals, well, even gods of mythology, it was an experience with the matters of the heart. Eww, I sound melodramatic. *cringe*

I have read an article about not dating a writer. It was written that one of the reasons why you shouldn’t date a writer was because he/she would write about your break up or use the pain from your break up to write something. Couldn’t be more true.

It is easier to wallow in pain than to stand up to the pain because as Augustus Waters said in The Fault In Our Stars, “pain demands to be felt.” You need to feel pain to feel the process of learning. Even if you have mastered the art of “numbing” yourself to the pain, you WOULD eventually feel it. Why not overcome it before you get too cold from numbing yourself? I know, I know, easier said than done.

Pain has its own way of seeping into our system. It has its own levels and degrees. Some you could just shrug off after a day, some could leave you curled up in your bed for a week, or maybe months, some could leave you in misery for years, but no matter how long it stays, you have to let it go.

“Let go and let God.”

You have seen that quote countless of times and it might have inspired you for a moment or maybe it is your mantra today, but let me tell you my interpretation on that quote.

Letting go of something meant you allowed it to go… you had the option of not allowing it to go but you CHOSE to release it. You have relinquished your hold on it and allowed God to take hold of it. In a way, you could say that you’re letting God handle whatever it is that you were letting go, and that would mean that you are giving God the authority over something that gripped you for some time and you are giving Him the power to do anything He wants to it.

“Let God” is not just about handing or passing the pain to God, it is more of believing in His power and having faith in His ability to turn something distressing into something good. Many times we are blinded by the pain that we don’t see we are losing focus on the path that we should take. Our vision were obscured by what we feel that we lost sight of what was real and what we should be doing. I have said earlier that pain should be felt because joy would not be apparent without anguish, so as light without the darkness. But it is tempting to wallow in self-pity and drown in the pools of misery.

It may surprise you that nowhere in the Bible are we told to ‘resist temptation’. Instead, we are advised to refocus our attention because resisting a thought doesn’t work. It only intensifies our focus on the wrong thing and strengthens its allure. You don’t defeat temptation by fighting the feeling of it. The more you fight a feeling, the more it consumes and controls you. You strengthen it every time you think it. Since temptation always begins with a thought, the quickest way to neutralize its allure is to turn your attention to something else. Don’t fight the thought, just change the channel of your mind and get interested in another idea. Learn More -http://purposedriven.com/

I saw that  status update from Purpose Driven Life’s Facebook and somehow I have likened it to dealing with pain. It’s true that the more you fight it, the more it becomes alluring, the more you want people to understand you, the more you want others to empathize your situation, but that results to vanity. You see only your self, your feelings and not how others are feeling. The more you fight it, the more it consumes you. So when it comes to pain, let it go and hand it to God, He knows what to do with it. That’s what it means to refocus too. Do not look at the pain but look at God. If you continue looking at Him, you will eventually find yourself thinking of other things besides your pain. Looking at God is like a drug, once you see His goodness and His awesomeness, it won’t be enough, you would ask for more but that’s where the similarity ends, unlike drugs, God is not bad for your health, it is otherwise.

When our visions are fogged by the pain, the quickest way to elude its tempting pull into misery is by refocusing our eyes on the Lord. When you feel the overwhelming fog of pain that surrounds you, look for the light, there will always be that light behind the fog. How else would you see the fog if there were only darkness? Don’t focus on the fog, focus on the lighted path. There will be fog in the path but you will never be lost if you search for the light.

What am I trying to say? In our walk with Christ, there will be pain, I assure you, there will be a lot of heart aches and heart breaks, but do not be discourage, for we have Light that guides us to the right path. No matter how thick the fog is there would be a light that would shine in the darkness. Hold on to that light. Continue walking towards it. Don’t fight the fog, instead, hold up the light. Let it shine on your path, one step at a time.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.

Philippians 4:8

Refocus your pain into something good, better yet, focus on God.

One year

I am officially working for Imagine Nation Photography for a year! Yay! It’s my “workiversary” or something.

(Side comment: My internet connection was cruel to me. It showed four bars but I was not getting any connection from it. *sigh*)

I should be really glad that I have another milestone in my career and I’m glad, but I’m not ecstatic over it. You see, last week, we started to work at home or “home-based” as they call it and I‘m not really fond of it. Though it has its perks because you get to control your time and you’re not restricted to an office environment, I just liked the separation of location of my work and where I relax. I am used to the idea that I go somewhere else to work. So what would happen if we are home-based? We would be project based (less income) and we would be working at home (obviously.) Some of my office mates, who were graphic artists in the production team, have no qualms on the matter but seeing that I’m not overly productive at home, I saw it as a challenge. I have to manage my time wisely in order for me to be more productive and I have to look for extra income.

I am hoping to find peace and strength in Christ as these things happen. I do not know what the future has in store for me, but I find comfort in knowing who holds my future. I am hoping that my mind would stop worrying and my heart would stop crumbling. But you know what, I’m glad that this happened because in times like this I seek His face the most. I am stubborn and I tend to do things my own way but His ways are greater and His plans are bigger, it would only make sense to let Him handle what I could not, which I should have done in the first place. Then, the pieces would just fall into place instead of letting fall into a different puzzle.

Something Beautiful

Woe is me

Bitter with self-pity

Who will love me but me

Or the God who I trust

He will set me free

From this bondage of sin

The darkness within

No, He will not let it win

He is just beginning

He will mend my broken wing

And fix me right up again

Using my brokenness into something

Something beautiful

Something hopeful

Something true 

Something new

Someone who would say

I love you.

Too Late

Oh boy, you have no clue

What have you have done

Or when is your cue

Poor boy, you missed your chance

You let love fly by

Without a glance

Too late, boy, don’t chase her

You made her cry

She has found another

It’s too late to try.