Challenges

Challenges can either make you or break you. I choose the former.

It's not surprising that this would be my first post for 2019. A lot has happened. Challenges happened. With God's grace, I was able to survive them.

As we have approached the 2nd half of the year, I cannot help but reflect on my challenges for the first half of 2019. Problems popped up in almost all the aspects of my life except love life... well, I think that one is really problematic, so I take back what I said, I had problems in EVERY aspect of my life. But I will not dwell on them too much for I know what will happen if I think about them too much.

But what I have learned through the hardships is "moving." In whatever state you are in, in whatever problem you are facing, you should always look up and look forward. Even if you feel like you are stuck, you have to still move, day by day, until the time comes when God would take you out of your slump. Successful people did not become successful by doing nothing. They moved, they initiated ideas even though many were against them, and they faced their giants. Even in front of their fears, the most important thing they did was to move. There were times that they stepped back but they took every learning experience from it.

I guess I am encouraging you, dear reader (or maybe me when I back read in the future), that whatever happens, hold on to hope and do not forget your goal. If you have achieved a goal, make another one or help others achieve theirs, and do not cease to hope for tomorrow. There will always be tomorrow until the day comes when we have to face our Maker.

Challenges made me who I am and made me learn more about myself and how to handle myself in adversity. I have yet to fully manage myself, but I am confident that I will continue to be positive and be joyous in hardships, for I know Who holds my tomorrows. 

Mercies in Disguise

 

The first time I heard the song “Blessings” by Laura Story, I was brought to tears. I knew then that this would be the song that I would like to be played in my funeral. After all, Funerals are not for the living. I want the people I love and the people who loved me to be comforted by this song and through God’s message.

If you have not heard of this song, listen to it and be blessed.

http://youtu.be/1CSVqHcdhXQ

Here’s the lyrics:

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/laurastory/blessings.html

 

The phrase that I really like in the song is… “Mercies in Disguise.” Last Sunday, a pastor reminded us what’s the difference between mercy and grace. Grace is a gift. It is something we do not deserve, something that is given freely. Mercy is when you do something wrong and you deserve punishment but you do not get it or you are pardoned. Grace is when we did not do anything but we still receive something.

What I liked about that phrase is that it reminded me how God loves us… that most of the time, we sin greatly, intentional or unintentionally, we sin. We think that a trial or discipline is God punishing us but what we do not know is that we deserve severe and gruesome punishments for what we’ve done. We cry out to Him thinking that the trials that we experience are His punishments, we think that it is so much that we cannot bear it but little do we know, we deserve more. We had it easy.

I had it easy. And in the face of trial, I crumbled. I said things I was not supposed to say, things I said out of spite and bitterness. I lost my focus in the face of adversity and I am ashamed for not trusting in the Lord. I have forgotten how He loves. I have forgotten that His mercies are new every morning. I became a Pharisee. I became righteous and God broke me. I was stubborn and I was so quick to judge people that I have forgotten to look into my heart. I do not deserve any of this, I deserve to die but God… His unfailing love… chose to save me.

God gave me hope.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

God has ways of comforting us and He gives it in perfect timing. There will be countless of trials and there is not s doubt that we will fail Him again. It’s in our nature. We might beat our chest and be ashamed to face Him. Know this, dear reader…

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young.

- Lamentations 3:22-27

 

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him… I prayed for a small group… He answered me with time. I pray that the Lord would help me utilize the time He has given me with wisdom. I thank the Lord for my mother, for understanding my heart that even though my decision would affect our expenses and my dream… she still encouraged me, she said to not lose hope and to always pray to our God in Jesus' Christ’s name. She said that trials may come but the Lord would never leave us, just keep on holding and not to let go of His grip.

I have friends and family that God uses to comfort me, what more can I ask for? Most of all, I have a God who is greater than anything in this world, a God whose love is indescribable, a God whose power is unfathomable, a God who never tires of loving me…

What more can I ask for?

Speech dedicated to those who failed

If you have read my previous blog entries, you would have an inkling of my school status. You may have also known that I have a plurk account and while browsing it, I saw a post from my friend on plurk. Here is the link.

I had goosebumps when I read that. it's encouraging and inspiring. It is something that I plan to achieve. I want to prove to the people who supported me that their help was not for naught. "tinamad" lang siguro ako.

Basta, I will not give up. I will graduate and I will continue to explore my capabilities, and if I am financially capable, i will study literature or get a masters degree. I will make the people who supported me proud and satisfied.

And of course, I will try my best to glorify God. This might not be His plan for me, but no matter, even if my plans won't go the way I wanted it to be, I'll keep holding on to God's promise.